Yep, that's my car. 240SX. Dead. I'm totally going to Tarantino it and now tell you how it happened.
So it's seven in the morning and I'm going west on a not so tiny street on my way to school where there is a neighborhood on the side of it. Some lady pulling out of the neighborhood decides that stop signs just aren't her thing, so she ignores it and keeps going to turn on to the street I'm on. Than...BOOM! my car does a little more than a 360 into the turn lane with me just takin' a seat in it.
Long story short, I won't have a car for a little while. It's alright though. Getting upset over things like that is what ruins everyday for you until you decide you can't do anything about it. So unless something a lot worse happens, I'll be good to go.

I've recently taken a trip down "reconsider lifestyle lane" and realized that there are very few people whom I actually care what they think of me. I know that sounds close to the whole "so what? i don't even care what you think!" kind of thing, but that's how I feel. Or at least how I think I feel. There are probably like seven or maybe eight people that would bother me if they hated me. It might seem like a big-ish number, but it's nothing compared to people who can't stand someone they don't even know not liking them.

ahhh, I've already had a very similar blog post as this one will be but I can't help it. It's because I think about this every time I listen to music that I'm really into which is pretty much every day. I think that just to satisfy me I might start actually trying something out when I find people that can play instruments and are interested in the same genre of music as I am. Pretty much everyone I know that plays an instrument just wants to imitate Chelsea Grin or Bring Me the Horizon. ewwwwwww. Anyway, if it works out that would be awesome. If it doesn't, than I know it isn't for me.

I'm excited for the summer. Today isn't as sunny as it has been the past couple days. I'm still excited though from the little taste of summer we've gotten in the past week. I'm excited for Raging Waters every week like last summer. I'm excited to be able to take a whole day, do nothing but play video games and not have it be a waste of a non-school day. I'm excited for Warped Tour. I'm excited for staying out until one in the morning and having it still be 75 degrees outside. I'm excited for a lot more too, but this would be way too long.

Right now I feel like ranting about all the dumb people and the dumb things they do. I'm sure I'm going to do this more than once, so this will be part one.

Wow, this has been the longest gap that I've had with not writing. Don't worry I haven't forgot. I just haven't had anything to write about really. Yesterday I went to my aunts house and had a very good dinner. I don't know about you, but I can't think of a better meat combo than steak and crab. Anyway I really like going to my aunts house even though I don't do it that often. Out of everyone I've ever known I thought that my mom, my aunt, and my cousin Gabi are the only ones that completely understood me, and how I think. And obviously I was wrong about one of them. So it's always nice to have talks with Gabi and my aunt. I mean there are some people who understand certain things about me, but even when they're with me and realize those things I still feel alone in my head. Maybe that's the way it's supposed to be though. Maybe people not being able to figure you out all the way is good, I don't know.

This entry is probably going to be very vague but still very... justifying? Anyway, I feel like I'm undergoing and working towards some giant change. It doesn't just feel like a personality one either. It feels like how I act, think, and even how I make myself look is all changing for the better and I'm helping myself along with it. I don't think it's because how I have been/currently am is bad. I think it's probably just everything about my character evolving and maturing. Talking to Cameren today make me realize how it's not so bad growing up. In an earlier post I said how I'm scared of it. Now though, even without tons of plans, I'm excited for it. I don't really have much else to say other than I'm growing up and I'm fine with it.

I'm about to sit down for a lifetime of homework, so I thought I'd do this before I do. Oh, and the picture on the side isn't related, really. It's just something from the weekend. Recently I've been having a hard time setting aside time for everything. Girlfriend, different friends, wrestling, homework, and alone time. I thought I did alright this weekend except for when I realized how much homework I have and that I have an entire English project due and a Theory of Knowledge quiz tomorrow. Since I didn't do as well as I thought I did last week, I'm going to try something different this week. Hopefully it works out better.

I'm considering getting a tattoo again. For people that didn't know before I was very close to getting "Closer to Complete" from one collar bone to the other a couple months ago, but I second guessed myself and decided not to. On Friday though, Josh said something about tattoos and since then I've been considering getting one again. I'm sure one day I'll end up getting one, it's just a matter of when. If i do get one soon, I'll probably just change it up. They stay with you forever so I want to make sure it's something that will always mean something to me and I'll be able to show off. 

I wish that was me. I stressed in an earlier post to have some sort of meaning for your life and actually do something. If there is anything that has meaning for me, it's this. Most dreams are ridiculously impossible to even touch. Well this one is no exception. I think the reason that I've been learning/playing guitar for the past year is to create some sort of outlet for this. By playing whatever songs I can learn I've been insignificantly "living the dream". I wish that I could dream more reasonably. hahaha, i can't believe i just wrote dream reasonably. I'm going to leave it there just because it makes me laugh. Someday I'm going to have to get a "real" job and sort of leave this in the dust. I think one of the reasons I haven't been able to find a career path I really like is because I'm not ready for that yet. I mean I'm sure I'll be able to find a good job that's important to other people. Still, none of them will quite compare. 

Today was the second day of the freestyle season for MountainTop. I only went to the little kids part of the practice today since I have region tomorrow for folkstyle. It's kind of weird looking around at all of them practicing because I know that every single one of them that keeps it up until they're in high school will be wrestling each other for state championships. I'm not really feeling going to region tomorrow. I would actually prefer if I wasn't wrestling in it because I'll be missing theory of knowledge. I'm also burnt out of the folkstyle season. It just gets to a point (about a month ago) where it isn't fun anymore, it's just tiring and time consuming. but oh well, if I didn't wrestle I'm sure I'd be very over weight and even more lazy.

Also, the future is scary. I turn eighteen this year and I don't like it. I still feel just as much as a kid as I did when I was fourteen, except now I'm a kid that drives. Hopefully by the time I am eighteen I'll feel a little more mature and sure of the future. If not I'm going to have a hard time deciding everything. I'll probably say more about this later, but I'm very tired now and I am going to sleep. Goodnight.

I'm sick of people who aren't going anywhere.
I'm sick of people just taking up space.
I'm sick of drug users.
I'm sick of irrational rationalizations.
I'm sick of people taking a seat and not going anywhere in life.
I'm sick of the people who aren't doing shit.
I'm sick of hollow minds.
I'm sick of unintelligence.
I'm sick of excuses.
I'm sick of people ruining the world.
I'm sick of aimless lives.
Stop sitting on your ass and doing drugs all day.
Stop sidestepping anything with meaning.
Stop wasting your body.
Stop being worthless.
Stop being an obstacle.
Do something or kill yourself, because no one cares.